Some Scripture passages make conversion sound so simple, like a one-and-done deal: \u201cImmediately they left their nets and followed him\u201d (Matthew 4:20). Would that it were so easy! John\u2019s Gospel, by contrast, is filled with encounters and dialogues that tell the story of a gradual and lifelong conversion in the heart of the disciple.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The encounters are many: Andrew (John 1:35-41), Nathanael\n(John 1:45-51), Nicodemus (John 3:1-21), the Samaritan woman at the well (John\n4:3-26), the woman caught in adultery (John 8:1-11), and of course Simon Peter\n(John 21:15-19).<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Each encounter is unique, yet there is a common pattern. We\nmight called it the S.A.L.A.D.<\/strong> method:\n(1) S<\/strong>ee, (2) A<\/strong>ttune, (3) L<\/strong>ove, (4) A<\/strong>waken,\nand (5) a D<\/strong>ifficulty D<\/strong>irectly addressed, or even a D<\/strong>art thrown by Jesus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n There are also opposite encounters and dialogues \u2013 interactions that evoke a hardness of heart, diminishing receptivity, and ultimately a rejection of Christ. Consider the disciples who cease following Jesus when he declares himself to be the Bread of Life and urges them to eat his flesh and drink his blood (John 6:25-66), or the Jewish leaders who gradually turn against him (John 8:12-59), or the intriguing Good Friday dialogue with Pontius Pilate (John 18:28-40).<\/p>\n\n\n\n Let\u2019s now take a look at the S.A.L.A.D.<\/strong> acronym and the gradualness that Jesus models for us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n See. <\/strong>First, Jesus s<\/u><\/strong>ees. He looks attentively at the person in front of him. I hope that we have all experienced this kind of seeing. We all need it, especially in our younger years, but throughout our life. It\u2019s a look of love, one that says \u201cI am interested in getting to know you.\u201d It\u2019s a look that desires to understand, to accept, and to encourage. It is a look that is free from expectations or demands. We just get to be ourselves in the presence of that gaze. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Think of what that look must have been like, for example, to\nthe woman at the well or the woman caught in adultery. There were many other\nlooks that they knew quite well: looks of judgment or condemnation, looks of\nleering or lust \u2013 or perhaps all of these at the same time! Jesus begins just\nby seeing the person in front of him, as one made by God, worth getting to\nknow.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Attune. <\/strong>Secondly, Jesus a<\/u><\/strong>ttunes. He looks deeply into the heart of the individuals in front of him. He gets to know their story, their deepest desires and needs, their greatest joys and most painful heartaches, and so forth. You can tell from each of these encounters that each person felt profoundly understood by Jesus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Unfortunately, not all of the characters in John\u2019s Gospel are interested in being understood in this way. Some put up defenses. Others insist on wearing a mask and pretending. The same is true of many of us. Not all of us allow ourselves to be understood, even though we all desire it in the depths of our being. It is so easy to feel threatened. Then comes the pride, self-reliance, self-protection, control, power, anger, or blame. I am personally familiar with all of them! Thankfully, God has given me plenty of chances, and in his mercy has allowed my defenses to crack and crumble and collapse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Love.<\/strong> Jesus l<\/u><\/strong>oves the person in front of him. It is not a superficial or sentimental love. It is a love that sees right through people \u2013 and loves them anyway. Just one experience of love in this way can change one\u2019s whole life. Shame is such an oppressive burden. Many of us are convinced that if others really got to know us, they would want nothing to do with us. The love of Jesus truly proclaims Good News in these dark places of the human heart.<\/p>\n\n\n\n These first three steps of\nseeing, attuning, and loving are far from a \u201cPollyanna\u201d approach. Jesus is well\naware of the faults of every person he encounters. Just as we have seen in\nGregory, Alcuin, and Paul, Jesus chooses to tolerate the evils that still need\nreforming. The relationship comes first. Unconditional love comes first. First\nwe must be free to be who we are; then we can become free in our acting and\ndoing. Repentance and conversion will come in due time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Awaken<\/strong>. Jesus a<\/u><\/strong>wakens desire in the heart of his hearers. Now that they have experienced understanding and love, they once again dare to hope, and the real growth begins. Once desire is awakened, it can catch fire quickly. The Greek word is eros<\/em> (cf<\/em>. \u201cerotic\u201d) and it is not uncommon for a convert to \u201cfall in love\u201d with the Lord and show all the eagerness of a lover in a romance. Not only does a lover do anything and everything he can to get to know the beloved and to fall more and more in love, he also feels the urge to proclaim to all the world the wonders of his beloved. I have seen the same when people have a genuine conversion experience. Certainly we see it in John\u2019s Gospel: Andrew rushes off to tell the Good News to his brother Simon. The woman at the well tells anyone who will hear about this man who unlocked the mystery of her entire life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Difficulties Addressed.<\/strong> Finally \u2013 and this point is crucial in John\u2019s Gospel \u2013 Jesus addresses d<\/u><\/strong>ifficulties. He waits until the right moment, when he knows the person is ready. Then he hurls a d<\/u><\/strong>art or a real zinger. It happens every time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n With the woman at the well, Jesus\ninvites her, \u201cGo, call your husband, and come back\u201d (John 4:16). He first saw\nher, attuned to her, loved her, and awakened her spiritual thirst. Then\nhe confronts her with the truth. She is ready. She confesses the truth. She has\nno husband. The man she is with is not her husband because she has been married\nfive times. Note that Jesus does not make concessions to the hard life and\nharsh treatment that she has almost certainly endured, leading her to the point\nof making these choices. He does not rationalize or downplay her sin. Nor does\nshe! He has gently and gradually brought her to a moment of conversion, so that\nshe can receive the spiritual water for which she so desperately thirsts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n There are other examples of darts and zingers, of\nconfronting the difficulty head on. Jesus exhorts the woman caught in adultery,\n\u201cGo your way, and from now on do not sin again\u201d (John 8:11). He jabs at\nNicodemus: \u201cAre you a teacher of Israel, and yet you do not understand these\nthings?\u201d (John 3:10). He reminds Pilate that he would have no authority\nwhatsoever if it were not granted him from on high (John 19:11).<\/p>\n\n\n\n With Nathanael it is a bit different. When Jesus \u201csees\u201d Nathanael,\nhe perceives one who is ready right away. Jesus is immediately blunt, in an\nalmost playful way: \u201cHere is truly an Israelite in whom there is no deceit \u2026 I\nsaw you under the fig tree before Philip called you\u201d (John 1:47-48). We never\nknow what Jesus \u201csaw\u201d under the fig tree, but can assume it was something\ndeeply personal and not entirely edifying. Yet Jesus affectionately accepts\nNathanael for who he is, promising him much greater things. Nathanael eagerly\nfollows.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Then there is Simon Peter, the ultimate example of gradual conversion. Peter is the epitome of two steps forward, one step back. The interesting thing in John\u2019s Gospel is that the \u201cdart\u201d comes at the very end, after the Resurrection, when Peter encounters Jesus on the seashore, after the catch of 153 fish.<\/p>\n\n\n\n First there is the gentle invitation to Peter to admit and repent of his threefold denial. He who warmed himself and three times denied his master by a charcoal fire on Holy Thursday is now allowed to affirm his love three times by a charcoal fire, drawing near to true warmth.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But there is more. In the original Greek of John\u2019s Gospel, Jesus asks Peter if he loves him with agape<\/em> \u2013 the ultimate gift of self in sacrifice (which Jesus had just shown in his Passion). Peter sheepishly responds that he \u201cloves\u201d Jesus with philia<\/em> \u2013 brotherly love \u2013 and is told to feed Christ\u2019s sheep. Peter has come so far, and still has so far to go. Jesus gently but painfully invites him to tell the full truth about his conversion. He truly loves Jesus, but is not yet ready to lay his life down for Jesus. One day he will be. He will grow stronger in due time, and will truly become the good shepherd who lays down his life for the sheep. For now, Peter’s love of Jesus is still a work in progress.\u00a0 It is enough. Jesus invites him, \u201cFollow me.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Thus in John\u2019s Gospel we see the human capacity to go either direction in an encounter with Jesus. Some of the characters allow themselves to be seen and understood and loved; they grow gradually in their desire and respond step by step. Others react or resist or retreat. In every case John leaves \u201cthe rest of the story\u201d untold. We remain free to go in either direction. One thing is certain: We are either drawing closer or distancing ourselves. In such encounters with the God\u2019s love and truth in the flesh, there is no standing still.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Some Scripture passages make conversion sound so simple, like a one-and-done deal: \u201cImmediately they left their nets and followed him\u201d (Matthew 4:20). Would that it were so easy! John\u2019s Gospel, by contrast, is filled with encounters and dialogues that tell the story of a gradual and lifelong conversion in the heart of the disciple. The … <\/p>\n